I have been waiting MONTHS to blog about my recent experiences. What was a waiting for? Well, I was waiting to know the results of my months of medical trials. The bad news, I still have no clue what is going on with my body (and neither does my doctor). The good news, I'm going to blog anyway.
First things first, you have to know something about me if you don't already. I have something called PKU. Google it if you have no clue. For those of you that have a clue, the following online broadcast about the effects of PKU explains me so well. It's long...but the first 20 minutes or so will help you understand me more. If you don't know me, you probably won't care. But for those that know me well, I highly recommend it.
My entire life I have been following special diets with little hope of change. The past year, their was at last hope. A medical company developed a drug that works in some people that could make life "normal".
My disease is rare, so little had been done before...mostly because of supply and demand. The science and technology are there, but the demand is low. With the new drug came something odd...marketing. The drug company needs demand...they need everyone from our small PKU population to try their "product". And that means marketing. Suddenly for the first time in my life I am able to find useful tools. There are special journals, a social website, free conferences, and online radio talk shows. I received more info from one of the broadcasts then from other sources most my life.
Also for the first time in my life, I have been able to eat "normal". I have tried pepperoni pizza, cheese quesadillas, fettuccine Alfredo, grilled cheese, ham, mozzarella sticks, etc. It's not really "normal". I have no idea how to eat "normal". My protein levels have been all over the board (translation: doctors have NO idea how much protein I am supposed to eat these days). Although eating "normal" is fun and easier socially, most the time I just crave french fries :)
Most my life, I have been eating about 15g-20g of protein a day. Right now I am supposed to eat 40g a day. My test results are "confusing" (Those were my doctor's words). I am finding it not really worth the problems - I feel a bit slow. My new found love for cheese would easily be traded for some french fries.
Does my future hold cheese or french fries? I have no idea. I'll write more as I find out. But it is indeed an interesting adventure, hopefully one without lasting brain damage :)
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
Spiritual Highs/Lows
Today was a really great day for just talking to students. Every Friday we do highs/lows (good part of the week, not so good part). Usually before Spring Break kids talk about partying. Somehow in the PM session, God just lead the time.
In the course of 3 hours, I had conversations 5 different students about the following.
1. Youth retreat for the weekend - one of the girls was really excited about her church retreat, mostly because of the fellowship...a nice surprise to learn she is involved in church
2. Youth groups in churches- One of my guys says he is going back to church after a run in with the police last night. Then we (him, another girl and I) discussed youth groups...the students feel youth groups for their population (at-risk areas) don't care about the youth, just babysit them. They like what they called "white" churches because the youth workers care about the youth. But they hate visiting because they are so cliquey
3.Diversity in worship - That lead to a conversation about worshiping in churches with all races and how much more amazing that would be...and that its the way God intended it to be.
4. Abortion and Emotional and Spiritual Ramifications - One student was asked to take his
girlfriend to get an abortion and is afraid to share his views with her. We talked about abortion and the emotional struggles post-abortion...very hard conversation because he is convinced she won't change her mind so he just needs to know how to support her
5. Healing and living your faith - One student acts out in school because of past struggles. He is a Christian and we talked about letting people see that in him...he asked for prayer
6. Promise rings vs. True Love Waits Rings - same guys girlfriend wants a promise ring. He didn't know what that was. We talked about purity and "why wait"
7. Waiting until marriage before living together and working at marriage instead of divorce - different group, similar topic. We were talking about my being single at my age...and somehow they were sharing how they don't think couples should live together. We talked about stats of divorce for those who live together and then how marriage should be worked on...even if hard times come - even cheating...forgiveness is important.
It was such a blessing to have these open doors and conversations, especially after a really long two weeks of really difficult students. But it was also hard to hear that the students are longing for ministry to them - for discipleship, for a prayer, and for fellowship. The need is there...I'm excited to see how God will provide...and willing to be a part of it in any way He allows.
In the course of 3 hours, I had conversations 5 different students about the following.
1. Youth retreat for the weekend - one of the girls was really excited about her church retreat, mostly because of the fellowship...a nice surprise to learn she is involved in church
2. Youth groups in churches- One of my guys says he is going back to church after a run in with the police last night. Then we (him, another girl and I) discussed youth groups...the students feel youth groups for their population (at-risk areas) don't care about the youth, just babysit them. They like what they called "white" churches because the youth workers care about the youth. But they hate visiting because they are so cliquey
3.Diversity in worship - That lead to a conversation about worshiping in churches with all races and how much more amazing that would be...and that its the way God intended it to be.
4. Abortion and Emotional and Spiritual Ramifications - One student was asked to take his
girlfriend to get an abortion and is afraid to share his views with her. We talked about abortion and the emotional struggles post-abortion...very hard conversation because he is convinced she won't change her mind so he just needs to know how to support her
5. Healing and living your faith - One student acts out in school because of past struggles. He is a Christian and we talked about letting people see that in him...he asked for prayer
6. Promise rings vs. True Love Waits Rings - same guys girlfriend wants a promise ring. He didn't know what that was. We talked about purity and "why wait"
7. Waiting until marriage before living together and working at marriage instead of divorce - different group, similar topic. We were talking about my being single at my age...and somehow they were sharing how they don't think couples should live together. We talked about stats of divorce for those who live together and then how marriage should be worked on...even if hard times come - even cheating...forgiveness is important.
It was such a blessing to have these open doors and conversations, especially after a really long two weeks of really difficult students. But it was also hard to hear that the students are longing for ministry to them - for discipleship, for a prayer, and for fellowship. The need is there...I'm excited to see how God will provide...and willing to be a part of it in any way He allows.
Sex Ed vs. Abstinence Ed
This may be a bit controversial. I tried to explain myself clearly. You don't have to agree...just know that as a teacher and a Christian, these are my thoughts.
Today at work, I talked to a young 16 year-old mother-to-be about her desire take a short vacation as soon as she has her baby because she deserves one. She has no idea that a mother NEEDS to be with her newborn. And a few classes later, I spent 30 minutes talking to one of my male students who is going to take his girlfriend to get an abortion over the break, even though he does not agree with the idea. It broke my heart.
Recent news reports in TX have been debating if the abstinence education programs have been effective. Statistics seem to say the teen pregnancy rate is higher than other states with sex ed programs like California. As a teacher of these teens, I had to react. These are not numbers to me...these are my kids.
The first thing they don't tell you on the news is that California's teen pregnancy rate is not lower, the teen birth rate is lower (similar amounts of girls get pregnant in Cali, but more of the girls have an abortion). And this can hardly mean the STD rate is significantly lower in Cali.
The second thing they don't tell you is that MOST of my students know how to have safe sex. Even the ones not having sex. Most know about STDS. I have even overheard them list symptoms and try to help diagnose each other (eww). But most do not use protection. Why? Because they have had abstinence education instead of sex ed? NO! The reason why my students do not use protection is because they don't want to. These things cannot happen to them. They will not get pregnant. They will not get an STD.
Teenagers have always been known for daring behavior and their "it can't happen to me" attitude. They can be the most brilliant teen in the world and they still might decide to do something crazy- like drive 100mph on the highway, not because they don't know the danger but because nothing will happen to them. We can teach them all about safe driving, but chances are they will still take the risk. I'm pretty sure my own car reached similar speeds in my teen years. We were just bored and having fun. Nothing could happen to us. (Even though we had people in our own class die from the same thing)
My point? My students are not getting pregnant or contracting STDs because they are naive. They do not need Sex Ed to teach them. They are not having unprotected sex because they don't know where to get protection. Most my students tell me they wont use pills because they don't like the way the pills make them feel (they were on them for a while). Most don't use other forms of protection because it "hinders" feelings and they know they won't get pregnant. They also know that the other one is "clean". Schools can spend millions of dollars and hundreds of hours educating kids on "safe" sex and the reality is, the students will still find themselves invincible.
So what about abstinence? Many people see it as a joke. Too many people think that no young person would ever be able to wait until marriage. If the adults have that attitude, how on earth can they expect teens to feel confident that they can wait? Many succeed. But teenagers can be as committed as they want to abstinence and fail. The reality is that abstinence education apart from the commitment to God is almost impossible. Most my students who have sex are not doing it for "fun" at first, but because they desire to feel loved. They may be taught that sex is not love, but that doesn't change the fact that it can feel like a substitute temporarily. Only a relationship with God can fill that emptiness. The teens who succeed in their abstinence vows are not more moral than others. And they do not succeed because of better abstinence education programs. They succeed because they KNOW that God loves them - they do not feel the void that so many have. All of those who are committed to abstinence at my school are vocal about how they commit because of their relationship with Christ. They come from the same difficult at-risk backgrounds as the others, but manage to abstain. They may be tempted, but the reality that God has a plan for their future and the commitment they made to Him is what allows them to have discipline.
Can we teach that in a class? Schools can encourage abstinence all they want, but the truth is, apart from a relationship with God, teens will continue to try to fill the void of love with something, and the temptation will most likely be too hard to resit.
It saddens me that so few of my students have the confidence to avoid saying no to sex even when they originally wanted to wait. It saddens me how many get pregnant and had refused to use pills because they think they look ugly when they gained a little weight from them (or sometimes their guy told them they looked ugly when they gained weight...they aren't even confident enough to protect themselves). It saddens me that some of them PURPOSELY get pregnant so that someone, their baby, will love them unconditionally (and yes, they will tell you this is the reason). It saddens me to know that many of them probably have STDS but I don't even want to ask or know. It breaks my heart most of all that I know that Christ can change their heart and attitude and give them the unconditional love, confidence and joy they so long for in a relationship...but the world labels Christ as offensive for me to share.
(I share anyway anytime I have a chance, and shared today especially with the male struggling with the abortion decision - he asked, God opened the door, I shared. If only that could be the "Sex Ed" curriculum)
Today at work, I talked to a young 16 year-old mother-to-be about her desire take a short vacation as soon as she has her baby because she deserves one. She has no idea that a mother NEEDS to be with her newborn. And a few classes later, I spent 30 minutes talking to one of my male students who is going to take his girlfriend to get an abortion over the break, even though he does not agree with the idea. It broke my heart.
Recent news reports in TX have been debating if the abstinence education programs have been effective. Statistics seem to say the teen pregnancy rate is higher than other states with sex ed programs like California. As a teacher of these teens, I had to react. These are not numbers to me...these are my kids.
The first thing they don't tell you on the news is that California's teen pregnancy rate is not lower, the teen birth rate is lower (similar amounts of girls get pregnant in Cali, but more of the girls have an abortion). And this can hardly mean the STD rate is significantly lower in Cali.
The second thing they don't tell you is that MOST of my students know how to have safe sex. Even the ones not having sex. Most know about STDS. I have even overheard them list symptoms and try to help diagnose each other (eww). But most do not use protection. Why? Because they have had abstinence education instead of sex ed? NO! The reason why my students do not use protection is because they don't want to. These things cannot happen to them. They will not get pregnant. They will not get an STD.
Teenagers have always been known for daring behavior and their "it can't happen to me" attitude. They can be the most brilliant teen in the world and they still might decide to do something crazy- like drive 100mph on the highway, not because they don't know the danger but because nothing will happen to them. We can teach them all about safe driving, but chances are they will still take the risk. I'm pretty sure my own car reached similar speeds in my teen years. We were just bored and having fun. Nothing could happen to us. (Even though we had people in our own class die from the same thing)
My point? My students are not getting pregnant or contracting STDs because they are naive. They do not need Sex Ed to teach them. They are not having unprotected sex because they don't know where to get protection. Most my students tell me they wont use pills because they don't like the way the pills make them feel (they were on them for a while). Most don't use other forms of protection because it "hinders" feelings and they know they won't get pregnant. They also know that the other one is "clean". Schools can spend millions of dollars and hundreds of hours educating kids on "safe" sex and the reality is, the students will still find themselves invincible.
So what about abstinence? Many people see it as a joke. Too many people think that no young person would ever be able to wait until marriage. If the adults have that attitude, how on earth can they expect teens to feel confident that they can wait? Many succeed. But teenagers can be as committed as they want to abstinence and fail. The reality is that abstinence education apart from the commitment to God is almost impossible. Most my students who have sex are not doing it for "fun" at first, but because they desire to feel loved. They may be taught that sex is not love, but that doesn't change the fact that it can feel like a substitute temporarily. Only a relationship with God can fill that emptiness. The teens who succeed in their abstinence vows are not more moral than others. And they do not succeed because of better abstinence education programs. They succeed because they KNOW that God loves them - they do not feel the void that so many have. All of those who are committed to abstinence at my school are vocal about how they commit because of their relationship with Christ. They come from the same difficult at-risk backgrounds as the others, but manage to abstain. They may be tempted, but the reality that God has a plan for their future and the commitment they made to Him is what allows them to have discipline.
Can we teach that in a class? Schools can encourage abstinence all they want, but the truth is, apart from a relationship with God, teens will continue to try to fill the void of love with something, and the temptation will most likely be too hard to resit.
It saddens me that so few of my students have the confidence to avoid saying no to sex even when they originally wanted to wait. It saddens me how many get pregnant and had refused to use pills because they think they look ugly when they gained a little weight from them (or sometimes their guy told them they looked ugly when they gained weight...they aren't even confident enough to protect themselves). It saddens me that some of them PURPOSELY get pregnant so that someone, their baby, will love them unconditionally (and yes, they will tell you this is the reason). It saddens me to know that many of them probably have STDS but I don't even want to ask or know. It breaks my heart most of all that I know that Christ can change their heart and attitude and give them the unconditional love, confidence and joy they so long for in a relationship...but the world labels Christ as offensive for me to share.
(I share anyway anytime I have a chance, and shared today especially with the male struggling with the abortion decision - he asked, God opened the door, I shared. If only that could be the "Sex Ed" curriculum)
Friday, March 06, 2009
My Students
This week was a really bad week. This blog is more for me to remember months from now than it is for you to read. But read anyway...
These past few weeks I have encountered the most disrespect I have ever experienced from my students. I'm really struggling to have compassion for them. Their culture is so lost, and sometimes it just frustrates me that they cannot see that constant drug use, gangs, carrying guns around, and having babies at 14 is not healthy for them emotionally or physically! (And of course, not at all spiritually!) But I graded their essays about fear and/or a journey and here are a few of topics they wrote...puts things in perspective:
When my sister and her girlfriend were killed by a drunk driver
When my dad died of lung cancer last year
I used to watch my stepdad hit my mother and I do not want to be like that to my own baby (that she is currently pregnant with)
I am trying to be a responsible teenage mother (more than one of these essays)
Being chased by the police when I had drugs (he did not get caught)
When a friend was almost shot at a party
When my father abused my mother (both who were drug addicts)
Finding my fathers gun for the first time
Taking ecstasy for the first time feeling I might die
Going to jail for theft
Stealing car radios and getting shot at and chased
Getting evicted from our home with no where to go
Running away with a friend who then wanted to use me for sex and then sleeping on the streets instead until I was so scared I went home
These past few weeks I have encountered the most disrespect I have ever experienced from my students. I'm really struggling to have compassion for them. Their culture is so lost, and sometimes it just frustrates me that they cannot see that constant drug use, gangs, carrying guns around, and having babies at 14 is not healthy for them emotionally or physically! (And of course, not at all spiritually!) But I graded their essays about fear and/or a journey and here are a few of topics they wrote...puts things in perspective:
When my sister and her girlfriend were killed by a drunk driver
When my dad died of lung cancer last year
I used to watch my stepdad hit my mother and I do not want to be like that to my own baby (that she is currently pregnant with)
I am trying to be a responsible teenage mother (more than one of these essays)
Being chased by the police when I had drugs (he did not get caught)
When a friend was almost shot at a party
When my father abused my mother (both who were drug addicts)
Finding my fathers gun for the first time
Taking ecstasy for the first time feeling I might die
Going to jail for theft
Stealing car radios and getting shot at and chased
Getting evicted from our home with no where to go
Running away with a friend who then wanted to use me for sex and then sleeping on the streets instead until I was so scared I went home
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Can't pay my bills b/c can't remember my fav actor 3 years ago...
Ok so the title is misleading, but could really happen.
I rarely complain on my blog. In fact, I am not very opinionated. But it is that very factor that causes this complaint. Today, while setting a password for PayPal I encountered once again a problem with security questions. Who on earth decided you can ask OPINION questions as security questions? What if I forget my password next year and all my favorites have changed! What if I don't remember what my favorite was years ago when I set up the account. Security questions need to stick to facts. It would be one thing if I was signing up for Facebook or something "fun"-but these silly questions are the security questions for my credit cards. My finances can be effected by my memory of who my favorite cartoon character was 3 years ago when I signed up for the online account.
Below are a list of real security questions from one of my credit cards that I cannot seem to answer. I had to pick three. I resorted to the only three that seemed like the answers cannot change over time. "What street did you grow up on?" "Who was your high school mascot?" and "What was your mother's maiden name?" which is difficult because I can never seem to spell it right! Here are the rest...
What is the name of your favorite childhood friend? Um, I had more than one
What is your favorite book? Changes
What is your favorite cartoon character? No idea
What is your favorite flower? Any people give me
What is your favorite movie? Changes
What is your favorite sport? Changes
What musical instrument do you play? Ok, not opinion, but I played two, so which would I put?
What was the name of your favorite teacher? Had more than one fav
What was your first pet's name? Had two first pets - at the same time
Where did you meet your spouse/significant other? No spouse for me but what if I were to answer this one while dating someone then need my password a year later when I have a new guy in my life?
Who is your favorite actor? Changes
Who is your favorite author? None (I'm not a very dedicated Literature teacher)
Who is your historical person? Um, never even thought about this.
Who is your favorite musician? Changes
I rarely complain on my blog. In fact, I am not very opinionated. But it is that very factor that causes this complaint. Today, while setting a password for PayPal I encountered once again a problem with security questions. Who on earth decided you can ask OPINION questions as security questions? What if I forget my password next year and all my favorites have changed! What if I don't remember what my favorite was years ago when I set up the account. Security questions need to stick to facts. It would be one thing if I was signing up for Facebook or something "fun"-but these silly questions are the security questions for my credit cards. My finances can be effected by my memory of who my favorite cartoon character was 3 years ago when I signed up for the online account.
Below are a list of real security questions from one of my credit cards that I cannot seem to answer. I had to pick three. I resorted to the only three that seemed like the answers cannot change over time. "What street did you grow up on?" "Who was your high school mascot?" and "What was your mother's maiden name?" which is difficult because I can never seem to spell it right! Here are the rest...
What is the name of your favorite childhood friend? Um, I had more than one
What is your favorite book? Changes
What is your favorite cartoon character? No idea
What is your favorite flower? Any people give me
What is your favorite movie? Changes
What is your favorite sport? Changes
What musical instrument do you play? Ok, not opinion, but I played two, so which would I put?
What was the name of your favorite teacher? Had more than one fav
What was your first pet's name? Had two first pets - at the same time
Where did you meet your spouse/significant other? No spouse for me but what if I were to answer this one while dating someone then need my password a year later when I have a new guy in my life?
Who is your favorite actor? Changes
Who is your favorite author? None (I'm not a very dedicated Literature teacher)
Who is your historical person? Um, never even thought about this.
Who is your favorite musician? Changes
Sunday, February 01, 2009
Everyone Keeps Sending me this survey...
My 25
1. In college, I used to dress up in a purple toga to cheer on LT and my Horned Frogs
2. I told my college advisor I would NOT take English classes because I would NEVER teach English no matter what.
3. I am a certified English teacher :)
4. I actually love my job most days – my at-risk teenagers completely fascinate me and break my heart all the same time
5. Every two months or so I want to quit my job and move half way across the world
6. I love writing and if I wasn’t a teacher or missionary, I’d be a journalist
7. I really don’t like reading the news online – I’m old fashioned and like to flip through the pages
8. I don’t currently subscribe to any newspaper because my neighbors kept stealing it and I just gave up and no longer read the news at all
9. I am non-confrontational, hence why I gave up my newspaper subscription
10. When I get mad at someone, I cannot stay mad very long. I always forget I am mad when I see the person because I am so excited to talk to them. Half the time they don’t even know I was ever mad
11. At least once a day, a quote from Friends enters my head. Usually, its when I’m around people who have no clue, but I love when I can just say the line and the other person understands me completely. I have a few friends and even a couple students who know all the lines too
12. I can actually watch any show. I will never turn off a movie or TV show in the middle, no matter how dumb it is. I like to know what happens. If I turn it off in the middle, I will dream about the ending, sometimes even months later.
13. LOST is the best show ever
14. I ate my very first real pizza slice last week and it was amazing
15. I’m not supposed to eat meat, but I have a weakness for pepperoni
16. I am a computer nerd - I could be on my computer all day and never notice the time go by
17. I rarely ever cry, but when I do I really cry
18. One of my favorite things to do is shop and SAVE more money then I spent. I love to go to sales or TJ Max and find really good deals. I can almost always tell you the price of anything I am wearing.
19. I don’t understand the obsession with shoes. I have the basics and even they stress me out. If I could, I would wear flip-flops or my Sketchers every day. But the fashionable side of me refuses.
20. When I was in seminary, I was a bad dresser. My DVR was set to tape What Not To Wear. I’d watch while I read my homework. One day I saw I sweater I owned on the things NOT to wear. I cleaned out a lot of stuff out of my closet that same day and since then was very careful about what I buy. Oddly enough, I still have that sweater for some reason. Haven’t worn it since though.
21. I also have no idea how to use makeup. I try something and if I like it, I continue to do the same every single day. I just have no idea how to change things.
22. Accessories make very little sense to me. I don’t understand how to match things. I like them on others though. I have TONS of jewelry I never wear.
23. I’ve lived in TX almost 10 years and rented the entire time because I really can’t commit to live here another year, even though I will probably live here forever
24. I want to live in Romania and New York City for at least a year of my life
25. I’m pretty sure this is the first one of these surveys I have ever done. The only reason I did it is because people keep tagging me on theirs. So I’m tagging all of you back.
1. In college, I used to dress up in a purple toga to cheer on LT and my Horned Frogs
2. I told my college advisor I would NOT take English classes because I would NEVER teach English no matter what.
3. I am a certified English teacher :)
4. I actually love my job most days – my at-risk teenagers completely fascinate me and break my heart all the same time
5. Every two months or so I want to quit my job and move half way across the world
6. I love writing and if I wasn’t a teacher or missionary, I’d be a journalist
7. I really don’t like reading the news online – I’m old fashioned and like to flip through the pages
8. I don’t currently subscribe to any newspaper because my neighbors kept stealing it and I just gave up and no longer read the news at all
9. I am non-confrontational, hence why I gave up my newspaper subscription
10. When I get mad at someone, I cannot stay mad very long. I always forget I am mad when I see the person because I am so excited to talk to them. Half the time they don’t even know I was ever mad
11. At least once a day, a quote from Friends enters my head. Usually, its when I’m around people who have no clue, but I love when I can just say the line and the other person understands me completely. I have a few friends and even a couple students who know all the lines too
12. I can actually watch any show. I will never turn off a movie or TV show in the middle, no matter how dumb it is. I like to know what happens. If I turn it off in the middle, I will dream about the ending, sometimes even months later.
13. LOST is the best show ever
14. I ate my very first real pizza slice last week and it was amazing
15. I’m not supposed to eat meat, but I have a weakness for pepperoni
16. I am a computer nerd - I could be on my computer all day and never notice the time go by
17. I rarely ever cry, but when I do I really cry
18. One of my favorite things to do is shop and SAVE more money then I spent. I love to go to sales or TJ Max and find really good deals. I can almost always tell you the price of anything I am wearing.
19. I don’t understand the obsession with shoes. I have the basics and even they stress me out. If I could, I would wear flip-flops or my Sketchers every day. But the fashionable side of me refuses.
20. When I was in seminary, I was a bad dresser. My DVR was set to tape What Not To Wear. I’d watch while I read my homework. One day I saw I sweater I owned on the things NOT to wear. I cleaned out a lot of stuff out of my closet that same day and since then was very careful about what I buy. Oddly enough, I still have that sweater for some reason. Haven’t worn it since though.
21. I also have no idea how to use makeup. I try something and if I like it, I continue to do the same every single day. I just have no idea how to change things.
22. Accessories make very little sense to me. I don’t understand how to match things. I like them on others though. I have TONS of jewelry I never wear.
23. I’ve lived in TX almost 10 years and rented the entire time because I really can’t commit to live here another year, even though I will probably live here forever
24. I want to live in Romania and New York City for at least a year of my life
25. I’m pretty sure this is the first one of these surveys I have ever done. The only reason I did it is because people keep tagging me on theirs. So I’m tagging all of you back.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
The World is Your Stage...and Facebook is the ticket vendor
I work with teenagers. Whether in school or church settings, they have all become completely obsessed with online profiles. The church ones flock to Facebook, my school ones to MySpace. And all this leads to problems. High school drama takes a new extreme. And worst of all, the world revolves around you and your profile. I've had small chats with many teenagers and peers who struggle with this, but a recent article said it well. The educator, sociologist, and theologian in me were all intrigued.
Relevant Magazine published an article called "The Problem of Pride in the Age of Twitter" by Brett McCracken. Part of me wishes I had written this article first! But he did a better job than I could have. Mine would have been more "sociological".
McCracken focused on the idea that we are obsessed with defining ourselves via play-by-play status updates and "....communication is no longer about learning things from people or sharing experiences; it's about knowing what they're doing and how they're feeling, or at least how they want the world to perceive them as such" Enter the drama.
It reminds me of the sociological concept of the looking-glass self. It was a term coined by Charles Cooley in 1902...that's over a hundred years ago. Apparently the problem is not new. Encyclopedia.com explains, "an individual's sense of self is derived from the perceptions of others. Just like the reflections in a mirror, the self depends on the perceived responses of others; or, as he himself puts it, ‘each to each a looking glass reflects the other that doth pass.'" It continues to explain,"The looking-glass self has three components: the imagination of our appearance to the other person; the imagination of their judgement of that appearance; and self feelings, such as pride."
If these explanations don't make sense, google the term. There are TONS of web pages dedicated to explaining it. Basically, the idea is that we think the whole world is watching us. The idea is that I am an actor on a stage, and everyone is watching my life. The way the "audience" perceives me defines who I am. So I strive to present myself the way I want the audience to see me. Of course, the audience is fictional. Or is it?
In Cooley's day, the audience was almost completely in one's mind. I remember walking through high school with a bad haircut thinking EVERYONE was watching, judging. They weren't. The Internet - Facebook, MySpace, YouTube, and Blogs have finally given the self-conscious teenager (as well as everyone else) an audience. Ever freak out because a "bad" picture of you was tagged? Or spend hours posing for a cute profile pic? Written a blog or status update just to get empathy? Created a YouTube video to show off? Why? Because you want people to think of you as attractive. You want people to understand where you are coming from. You want people to see you shine.
When it all comes down to it, things haven't changed much since Cooley created the theory in 1902. Thanks to the Internet, everyone is welcome to be part of the audience. But I think most the audience still only consists of a select few. I have over 400 friends on facebook. I sometimes read updates on my newsfeed, but don't really care about most of those. The problem is that we THINK everyone cares. We insist people comment on our walls, blogs, status updates, videos, etc because we really want to know how people perceive us and that people care.
This blog will be "readable" by over 400 facebook friends and anyone who finds it via google. My pride could tell myself "All these people will be transformed by my amazing words". Reality is that only a few will read, and even fewer comment. And that's ok.
McCracken's article concluded that the problem of pride is not new to the church but "Technology has only exacerbated it. In times like these-when it's easier and more alluring than ever to be or feel important-Christians must remember that we're not called to be viral superstars. We're called to be living sacrifices. We're not instructed to make ourselves look as good as possible in front of the largest audience we can; no, we are instructed to deny ourselves and humbly follow Christ." What do you think?
Relevant Magazine published an article called "The Problem of Pride in the Age of Twitter" by Brett McCracken. Part of me wishes I had written this article first! But he did a better job than I could have. Mine would have been more "sociological".
McCracken focused on the idea that we are obsessed with defining ourselves via play-by-play status updates and "....communication is no longer about learning things from people or sharing experiences; it's about knowing what they're doing and how they're feeling, or at least how they want the world to perceive them as such" Enter the drama.
It reminds me of the sociological concept of the looking-glass self. It was a term coined by Charles Cooley in 1902...that's over a hundred years ago. Apparently the problem is not new. Encyclopedia.com explains, "an individual's sense of self is derived from the perceptions of others. Just like the reflections in a mirror, the self depends on the perceived responses of others; or, as he himself puts it, ‘each to each a looking glass reflects the other that doth pass.'" It continues to explain,"The looking-glass self has three components: the imagination of our appearance to the other person; the imagination of their judgement of that appearance; and self feelings, such as pride."
If these explanations don't make sense, google the term. There are TONS of web pages dedicated to explaining it. Basically, the idea is that we think the whole world is watching us. The idea is that I am an actor on a stage, and everyone is watching my life. The way the "audience" perceives me defines who I am. So I strive to present myself the way I want the audience to see me. Of course, the audience is fictional. Or is it?
In Cooley's day, the audience was almost completely in one's mind. I remember walking through high school with a bad haircut thinking EVERYONE was watching, judging. They weren't. The Internet - Facebook, MySpace, YouTube, and Blogs have finally given the self-conscious teenager (as well as everyone else) an audience. Ever freak out because a "bad" picture of you was tagged? Or spend hours posing for a cute profile pic? Written a blog or status update just to get empathy? Created a YouTube video to show off? Why? Because you want people to think of you as attractive. You want people to understand where you are coming from. You want people to see you shine.
When it all comes down to it, things haven't changed much since Cooley created the theory in 1902. Thanks to the Internet, everyone is welcome to be part of the audience. But I think most the audience still only consists of a select few. I have over 400 friends on facebook. I sometimes read updates on my newsfeed, but don't really care about most of those. The problem is that we THINK everyone cares. We insist people comment on our walls, blogs, status updates, videos, etc because we really want to know how people perceive us and that people care.
This blog will be "readable" by over 400 facebook friends and anyone who finds it via google. My pride could tell myself "All these people will be transformed by my amazing words". Reality is that only a few will read, and even fewer comment. And that's ok.
McCracken's article concluded that the problem of pride is not new to the church but "Technology has only exacerbated it. In times like these-when it's easier and more alluring than ever to be or feel important-Christians must remember that we're not called to be viral superstars. We're called to be living sacrifices. We're not instructed to make ourselves look as good as possible in front of the largest audience we can; no, we are instructed to deny ourselves and humbly follow Christ." What do you think?
Friday, December 19, 2008
Field Trip
Today I experienced my first ever field trip with my students. I have tried (and failed) many times to take students to the Holocaust Museum in Dallas. After all sorts of ridiculous problems, we were finally able to make it a reality.
Nineteen at-risk 10th grades (from age 14-19) gave up their "Christmas Movie Day" today to instead go to the museum. They were so excited. We loaded the bus and headed to Dallas.
My students just finished reading the book "Night" by Elie Wiesel. So many of them read ahead in the book, and most say its the best book they have every read. Some say its the only book they ever actually read. A few ask if they can have a personal copy.
We were blessed to hear a survivor speak. As we waited anxiously, we talked about how this is probably the only time they will hear a survivor. We discussed how their children won't have that option because the survivors are aging. My only pregnant girl on the trip proudly proclaimed that her daughter is getting to hear a survivor. I smiled. We talked about how when her daughter learns about the Holocaust in school, she will probably be the only one that ever had that opportunity, even if there is no way she will remember it.
Max Glauben shared with us. His story was amazing.(See it on YouTube link at end of this blog)
We combined with another school, with about 50 students of their own. My students listened, most with wide eyes. One of my favorite students, lets call her Julie, was the only one bold enough to ask any questions after his talk. She asked how he was able to stay alive with so much discouragement. Glauben shared about his faith helping him persevere. I was so proud of her.
His talk was about an hour and one of my most difficult students looked a bit bored. Let's call him Mike. I was disappointed because I thought he had tuned out. But then Glauben mentioned his tattoo, explaining how inhumanly it was applied. Mike is a tattoo artist, and his attention was immediately captured. After the talk, Mike was the only student brave enough to ask to see the tattoo up close.
Mike and I had some issues this term. He had been so disrespectful to me and our substitute, so I told him he could not go on the field trip. When we finished the book, he begged me to let him go, offered to pay his own way, and wanted his own copy of the book to read again. I gave in.
Today, I almost cried when he came up to me to tell me about seeing Glauben's tattoo. He said "Thank you so much for taking me, miss. This was a really amazing experience." I have never heard him so genuine.
As we made our way through the really small museum exhibits, my students spent SO much time reading and listening to their audio guides. I am not very good with museums and especially audio guides. I think they did better than I did. They took pho
tos and asked me questions. They learned so much even though the museum was small. On the way back, they were hungry and rowdy, but after about 10 minutes, they all fell asleep :)
As I looked around at them sleeping and recalled their comments to me all day, I was so grateful for a chance to be part of this experience. Most of them will remember this experience the rest of their lives. They knew I fought hard to be sure the field trip happened. I have never seen such impact or gratitude. I am so blessed to be a part of shaping their lives.
Nineteen at-risk 10th grades (from age 14-19) gave up their "Christmas Movie Day" today to instead go to the museum. They were so excited. We loaded the bus and headed to Dallas.
My students just finished reading the book "Night" by Elie Wiesel. So many of them read ahead in the book, and most say its the best book they have every read. Some say its the only book they ever actually read. A few ask if they can have a personal copy.
We were blessed to hear a survivor speak. As we waited anxiously, we talked about how this is probably the only time they will hear a survivor. We discussed how their children won't have that option because the survivors are aging. My only pregnant girl on the trip proudly proclaimed that her daughter is getting to hear a survivor. I smiled. We talked about how when her daughter learns about the Holocaust in school, she will probably be the only one that ever had that opportunity, even if there is no way she will remember it.
Max Glauben shared with us. His story was amazing.(See it on YouTube link at end of this blog)We combined with another school, with about 50 students of their own. My students listened, most with wide eyes. One of my favorite students, lets call her Julie, was the only one bold enough to ask any questions after his talk. She asked how he was able to stay alive with so much discouragement. Glauben shared about his faith helping him persevere. I was so proud of her.
His talk was about an hour and one of my most difficult students looked a bit bored. Let's call him Mike. I was disappointed because I thought he had tuned out. But then Glauben mentioned his tattoo, explaining how inhumanly it was applied. Mike is a tattoo artist, and his attention was immediately captured. After the talk, Mike was the only student brave enough to ask to see the tattoo up close.
Mike and I had some issues this term. He had been so disrespectful to me and our substitute, so I told him he could not go on the field trip. When we finished the book, he begged me to let him go, offered to pay his own way, and wanted his own copy of the book to read again. I gave in.
Today, I almost cried when he came up to me to tell me about seeing Glauben's tattoo. He said "Thank you so much for taking me, miss. This was a really amazing experience." I have never heard him so genuine.
As we made our way through the really small museum exhibits, my students spent SO much time reading and listening to their audio guides. I am not very good with museums and especially audio guides. I think they did better than I did. They took pho
tos and asked me questions. They learned so much even though the museum was small. On the way back, they were hungry and rowdy, but after about 10 minutes, they all fell asleep :)As I looked around at them sleeping and recalled their comments to me all day, I was so grateful for a chance to be part of this experience. Most of them will remember this experience the rest of their lives. They knew I fought hard to be sure the field trip happened. I have never seen such impact or gratitude. I am so blessed to be a part of shaping their lives.
Monday, December 08, 2008
Do or do not, there is no try
What horrible advice! I don't consider myself a student of Master Yoda. Although I think he's kind of cute, his "wisdom" isn't always wise. For some reason, I seem to follow his words.
Sometimes its easier to "do not" than to try and fail. I find that I will avoid trying new things. I would rather have the hope of success and enjoyment later than the failure now. If I don't try, it might still work someday when I do.
A silly example...every now and then they come up with new "low protein" food choices. (If you don't know, I have a special diet I need to follow). I will order the new product and when it arrives, admire it from a distance. Occasionally, I will examine the packaging. It takes weeks to build up the courage to have a taste.
The most recent was "low pro" hot dogs. I love hot dogs, but I am not really supposed to eat them. The "low pro" ones looked great and I was excited to try them. As soon as they arrived, I packed them away. They spent a month in the freezer. I would see them and have hope that perhaps I had found an alternative to hot dogs - that I could bring them to summer BBQs and maybe everywhere else I go. Finally, one day I had nothing to eat in my cabinets, so I gave in and tried one. It was probably one of the most disgusting things I have ever tasted! I once again had no hope of a "low pro" hot dog. So was it better to live with "hope" in suspense? Or to know the truth (that they were indeed DISGUSTING!)?
January of this year, I heard of a medicine that could change my life. I quickly signed up for the program. I was told I would try it right away. After months of insurance problems, phone tag, and misunderstandings, its now December. I might finally get to try it. And it scares me. For a year, I have had hope that it will work. I am so excited about what life could be...so much less guilt at meal time and so much more ejnoyment. In just a few weeks, I will either have a different lifestyle OR go back to my hopeless hot-dog-free diet. Somehow, the unknown seems more comforting than the truth. But I know that if I don't try, I will NEVER be able to enjoy hot dogs, pepperoni, and cheese guilt free. Do or do not, there is no try? I think not. I am ready to know the truth!
Sometimes its easier to "do not" than to try and fail. I find that I will avoid trying new things. I would rather have the hope of success and enjoyment later than the failure now. If I don't try, it might still work someday when I do.
A silly example...every now and then they come up with new "low protein" food choices. (If you don't know, I have a special diet I need to follow). I will order the new product and when it arrives, admire it from a distance. Occasionally, I will examine the packaging. It takes weeks to build up the courage to have a taste.
The most recent was "low pro" hot dogs. I love hot dogs, but I am not really supposed to eat them. The "low pro" ones looked great and I was excited to try them. As soon as they arrived, I packed them away. They spent a month in the freezer. I would see them and have hope that perhaps I had found an alternative to hot dogs - that I could bring them to summer BBQs and maybe everywhere else I go. Finally, one day I had nothing to eat in my cabinets, so I gave in and tried one. It was probably one of the most disgusting things I have ever tasted! I once again had no hope of a "low pro" hot dog. So was it better to live with "hope" in suspense? Or to know the truth (that they were indeed DISGUSTING!)?
January of this year, I heard of a medicine that could change my life. I quickly signed up for the program. I was told I would try it right away. After months of insurance problems, phone tag, and misunderstandings, its now December. I might finally get to try it. And it scares me. For a year, I have had hope that it will work. I am so excited about what life could be...so much less guilt at meal time and so much more ejnoyment. In just a few weeks, I will either have a different lifestyle OR go back to my hopeless hot-dog-free diet. Somehow, the unknown seems more comforting than the truth. But I know that if I don't try, I will NEVER be able to enjoy hot dogs, pepperoni, and cheese guilt free. Do or do not, there is no try? I think not. I am ready to know the truth!
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Peace
I've never wrote a blog without first knowing where I am going with my thoughts...but here goes...
Romania was a big wake up call for me. Being away from my "reality" for two months taught me a lot, but perhaps the biggest thing was how much my character had truly changed in the years after college leading up to the trip. And not changed in the good way. Changed in the snobby "I belong in the movie Mean Girls" way. Post college bitterness turned into "I deserve better". Add some people in my life who felt the same, and I had my own group to call or text me whenever I want to tell me anything I wanted to hear. I seemed to always be disappointed and worried about the future. I decided in Jan I needed to "fix" things. Over the last year, I have withdrawn from many people in my life (some good influences, some not so good). Before this summer, I found myself struggling with how I could ever stay in Texas and actually be used by Him with the mess I had here.
Then came Romania. I went from nights alone just me and God to living in a house constantly surrounded by people. I'd like to say the biggest thing I learned in Romania was something sweet about the orphans. They were amazing. But the thing I learned best was that I truly had a long way to go to get back to a character reflecting Christ. It's amazing how sharing close quarters with others allows your true character to spill out. I'm not proud of how shallow some relationships were. I am not proud of how little I did to encourage others. But I know God used it to remind me of who I was in Him in college and to teach me how to ignite that desire again.
Since I've been back, I haven't followed a different "formula" or "plan". Quiet times are about the same. My job is still demanding and really difficult. But somehow, now I have peace. The past few days, I was sick and had trouble sleeping. I began to feel a little stress. I realized that it was the first time I felt stress since before Romania. Instead of freaking out about the stress, I began to wonder, "Why no stress until now? " A lot has been going "wrong" by any one's measure. Although circumstances have not changed since this summer, my character and perspective have been transformed. I realized I am not feeling stress because I am finally learning to truly turn things over to God. In Romania,I lived without a phone and TV for two months. And when I came back from Romania, I had no computer for a month! It became normal. Now when problems arise, I don't call a friend; I pray first. The best part is that without distractions, I am able to hear God's voice again...
Work seems routine and hard. I pray. God says start a yearbook. Suddenly, I have something to love about work.
Youth stuff is confusing because I have no actual role in the youth group. I pray. Pour more into discipleship and spend time praying for students. Discipleship is going great and my students now talk to me about God in the middle of classes.
Relationships seem confusing. I pray. Friends and family bring up any topic I struggled with, within a day of praying.
My friend reminded me of some lyrics the other day..."Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bear, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer". I prayed before Romania, but not like this. I prayed in Romania and found guidance about "camp" stuff. But now I'm back in my "reality". Its amazing how prayer without TV, cell phones, or even others to distract has truly changed my character as only God can. If only I could get back those years of needless worry and pain! Obviously that's not an option, but its amazing how God is fixing my past "messes" as I take the present trials to Him in prayer.
Romania was a big wake up call for me. Being away from my "reality" for two months taught me a lot, but perhaps the biggest thing was how much my character had truly changed in the years after college leading up to the trip. And not changed in the good way. Changed in the snobby "I belong in the movie Mean Girls" way. Post college bitterness turned into "I deserve better". Add some people in my life who felt the same, and I had my own group to call or text me whenever I want to tell me anything I wanted to hear. I seemed to always be disappointed and worried about the future. I decided in Jan I needed to "fix" things. Over the last year, I have withdrawn from many people in my life (some good influences, some not so good). Before this summer, I found myself struggling with how I could ever stay in Texas and actually be used by Him with the mess I had here.
Then came Romania. I went from nights alone just me and God to living in a house constantly surrounded by people. I'd like to say the biggest thing I learned in Romania was something sweet about the orphans. They were amazing. But the thing I learned best was that I truly had a long way to go to get back to a character reflecting Christ. It's amazing how sharing close quarters with others allows your true character to spill out. I'm not proud of how shallow some relationships were. I am not proud of how little I did to encourage others. But I know God used it to remind me of who I was in Him in college and to teach me how to ignite that desire again.
Since I've been back, I haven't followed a different "formula" or "plan". Quiet times are about the same. My job is still demanding and really difficult. But somehow, now I have peace. The past few days, I was sick and had trouble sleeping. I began to feel a little stress. I realized that it was the first time I felt stress since before Romania. Instead of freaking out about the stress, I began to wonder, "Why no stress until now? " A lot has been going "wrong" by any one's measure. Although circumstances have not changed since this summer, my character and perspective have been transformed. I realized I am not feeling stress because I am finally learning to truly turn things over to God. In Romania,I lived without a phone and TV for two months. And when I came back from Romania, I had no computer for a month! It became normal. Now when problems arise, I don't call a friend; I pray first. The best part is that without distractions, I am able to hear God's voice again...
Work seems routine and hard. I pray. God says start a yearbook. Suddenly, I have something to love about work.
Youth stuff is confusing because I have no actual role in the youth group. I pray. Pour more into discipleship and spend time praying for students. Discipleship is going great and my students now talk to me about God in the middle of classes.
Relationships seem confusing. I pray. Friends and family bring up any topic I struggled with, within a day of praying.
My friend reminded me of some lyrics the other day..."Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bear, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer". I prayed before Romania, but not like this. I prayed in Romania and found guidance about "camp" stuff. But now I'm back in my "reality". Its amazing how prayer without TV, cell phones, or even others to distract has truly changed my character as only God can. If only I could get back those years of needless worry and pain! Obviously that's not an option, but its amazing how God is fixing my past "messes" as I take the present trials to Him in prayer.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Self-Check Out
The other day I had an odd experience at the grocery store. It all started when I walked in. For some reason, I set the alarm off walking in. I paused, shocked, and looked around. No one seemed to want to check me or my large purse. I realized their were no baskets so I would need to go back outside to get a cart. On my way out, the alarm rang again. Really weird. But no one even looked my direction. My way back in I didn't even pause at the alarm...obviously no one cared.
Then for the next odd part.Remember when grocery stores had express lanes? Ten items or less allowed you to bypass those with a cart full of items. But someone had a great idea to create a self checkout line. It must have sounded like a good idea on paper...they don't have to pay anyone to scan the groceries. We feel special because we get to quickly scan groceries. Up until a few days ago, my only annoyance with them was the constant "skip bagging?" alert every time I bought a light weight item. But was this really a good idea?
I was at the store at a peak time 5pm on a weekday to pick up a few items. Since express lanes no longer exist and too many people were buying a months supply of groceries, I opted for the self checkout. They had 6 "lanes" total, so I did not mind the four people with almost empty carts waiting in front of me. The "supervisor" was busy wiping down a few of the "lanes" that I quickly realized were not turned on. Only 3 were on and open, only 1 for my line. Even though the store was packed and lines were growing quickly, the others were not turned on. But they were very clean when she was done with them. The few people in front of me were obviously annoyed. I saw the women a few people in front of me had flowers and I wondered how long that would take to scan and price check. To my surprise, the flowers scanned find. But it was a different story for the bottled water. The "supervisor" walked by them without helping. After repeated attempts to scan the water, the women just shrugged their shoulders and placed the water in their basket anyway. They smiled at each other and laughed awkwardly. These otherwise innocent 40 year old women had to resort to stealing! (Ok, they did not have to, but those behind them in line were not willing to wait for the supervisor to come back and help them, so no one told on them).
The next person had even more trouble. The supervisor had to enter her code three times. Not one time did she check to see why she was entering the code. I think it was an innocent mistake, but I am pretty sure the man did not scan one of his three 12-packs of cola.
I waited 15 minutes for my turn to purchase my seven items, and as I walked out the doors, the alarm went off again. I could have fit almost anything in that big purse of mine. No one stopped me or even looked my direction, so I just kept on going. I couldn't help but think how I could have saved 15 minutes and a few dollars had I just filled my purse with the items and walked out. Or waited in my line but skipped the scan for my higher priced item. Of course, I would never, but I wondered how many do fall to the temptation, or at least how many people "forget" to scan an item or two. I can't help but wonder if the stores really are saving money with these "self-check out" lines. In my fifteen minute wait alone in one line the store lost at least $10. I never knew a grocery store employee to make $10 every fifteen minutes. Perhaps they should rethink the system.
**Searching my purse later, I found that I had a DVD in my purse that I had been showing in my class that day...I'm guessing it set off the alarm.
Then for the next odd part.Remember when grocery stores had express lanes? Ten items or less allowed you to bypass those with a cart full of items. But someone had a great idea to create a self checkout line. It must have sounded like a good idea on paper...they don't have to pay anyone to scan the groceries. We feel special because we get to quickly scan groceries. Up until a few days ago, my only annoyance with them was the constant "skip bagging?" alert every time I bought a light weight item. But was this really a good idea?
I was at the store at a peak time 5pm on a weekday to pick up a few items. Since express lanes no longer exist and too many people were buying a months supply of groceries, I opted for the self checkout. They had 6 "lanes" total, so I did not mind the four people with almost empty carts waiting in front of me. The "supervisor" was busy wiping down a few of the "lanes" that I quickly realized were not turned on. Only 3 were on and open, only 1 for my line. Even though the store was packed and lines were growing quickly, the others were not turned on. But they were very clean when she was done with them. The few people in front of me were obviously annoyed. I saw the women a few people in front of me had flowers and I wondered how long that would take to scan and price check. To my surprise, the flowers scanned find. But it was a different story for the bottled water. The "supervisor" walked by them without helping. After repeated attempts to scan the water, the women just shrugged their shoulders and placed the water in their basket anyway. They smiled at each other and laughed awkwardly. These otherwise innocent 40 year old women had to resort to stealing! (Ok, they did not have to, but those behind them in line were not willing to wait for the supervisor to come back and help them, so no one told on them).
The next person had even more trouble. The supervisor had to enter her code three times. Not one time did she check to see why she was entering the code. I think it was an innocent mistake, but I am pretty sure the man did not scan one of his three 12-packs of cola.
I waited 15 minutes for my turn to purchase my seven items, and as I walked out the doors, the alarm went off again. I could have fit almost anything in that big purse of mine. No one stopped me or even looked my direction, so I just kept on going. I couldn't help but think how I could have saved 15 minutes and a few dollars had I just filled my purse with the items and walked out. Or waited in my line but skipped the scan for my higher priced item. Of course, I would never, but I wondered how many do fall to the temptation, or at least how many people "forget" to scan an item or two. I can't help but wonder if the stores really are saving money with these "self-check out" lines. In my fifteen minute wait alone in one line the store lost at least $10. I never knew a grocery store employee to make $10 every fifteen minutes. Perhaps they should rethink the system.
**Searching my purse later, I found that I had a DVD in my purse that I had been showing in my class that day...I'm guessing it set off the alarm.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
REGRET IT FOREVER!!!!!!!!!
Every time I drive up or down I-35 across the Kansas turnpike near Emporia, my eyes are drawn to an old billboard with a simple message..."Accept Jesus Christ and be saved or REGRET IT FOREVER." Most people probably think its annoying, insulting, or maybe some think its wonderful. Each time I see the billboard the same thought enters my mind (which is often because the board is on BOTH sides of the road, how thoughtful of them). Perhaps its the sociologist in me, but I always wonder how many people have truly been "saved" through a billboard like this. Does God use it to convict people? Does it cause them to examine their lives? I am not one to judge, I have no idea what God might be doing through it, but it saddens me how the message if watered down.
As Christians, we try to remind people that they don't want to go to hell. Heaven sounds so much better. Who wouldn't want to be saved from burning in hell? But what is heaven? If heaven is eternity with God, and someone hasn't ever experienced God's presence on earth, why would that be appealing? We are asking them to trade in a lifestyle that seems fun to them for an investment that to them only pays in the end. And in their eyes, the pay isn't all that great.
Since when is the gospel only about joy in eternity? What happened to the joy that comes in Christ NOW, on this side of heaven. Scripture is filled with references to the kingdom of heaven being NOW on earth and in heaven. So many passages deal with how Christ transforms our life today, not by laws and morals, but through peace, joy, and purpose. Why are we trying trying to reach a instant-gratification generation with an attempt to "sell" a better afterlife when clearly Christ offers so much more.
The problem is most of us live with the Heaven part in mind, and let the every day reflect our human nature. I can tell everyone they can have joy in Christ now and for eternity, but as I grumble about my job, finances, social situations, love life, etc...why would they ever believe me? If I am not living like my life is transformed now, then the world sees my faith as nothing but "fire insurance".
Recently, I listened to a sermon about Matthew 13, the parable of the Sower. As the pastor elaborated on the different types of seeds he explained that the seed that fell among thorns started to grow, but was choked by the thorns, by the trials in the world. I began to wonder if that is what I look like to the world. As trials and just everyday life happen, do I let my faith be choked? Is my faith still evident? I know my relationship with Christ is genuine, but is it reflected to others? I have never bought into the "fire insurance" style of evangelism and never will. I don't need to be perfect, that's not possible this side of heaven. But if I am going to be so bold as to evangelize a faith that transforms lives here and now on earth, I want to be sure that is what my life is a testimony for.
As Christians, we try to remind people that they don't want to go to hell. Heaven sounds so much better. Who wouldn't want to be saved from burning in hell? But what is heaven? If heaven is eternity with God, and someone hasn't ever experienced God's presence on earth, why would that be appealing? We are asking them to trade in a lifestyle that seems fun to them for an investment that to them only pays in the end. And in their eyes, the pay isn't all that great.
Since when is the gospel only about joy in eternity? What happened to the joy that comes in Christ NOW, on this side of heaven. Scripture is filled with references to the kingdom of heaven being NOW on earth and in heaven. So many passages deal with how Christ transforms our life today, not by laws and morals, but through peace, joy, and purpose. Why are we trying trying to reach a instant-gratification generation with an attempt to "sell" a better afterlife when clearly Christ offers so much more.
The problem is most of us live with the Heaven part in mind, and let the every day reflect our human nature. I can tell everyone they can have joy in Christ now and for eternity, but as I grumble about my job, finances, social situations, love life, etc...why would they ever believe me? If I am not living like my life is transformed now, then the world sees my faith as nothing but "fire insurance".
Recently, I listened to a sermon about Matthew 13, the parable of the Sower. As the pastor elaborated on the different types of seeds he explained that the seed that fell among thorns started to grow, but was choked by the thorns, by the trials in the world. I began to wonder if that is what I look like to the world. As trials and just everyday life happen, do I let my faith be choked? Is my faith still evident? I know my relationship with Christ is genuine, but is it reflected to others? I have never bought into the "fire insurance" style of evangelism and never will. I don't need to be perfect, that's not possible this side of heaven. But if I am going to be so bold as to evangelize a faith that transforms lives here and now on earth, I want to be sure that is what my life is a testimony for.
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Romania Videos 4:Body Builders
And I could not resist showing a clip of the "body builder" competition, a fav of mine every week. This is the same as the one I posted before, but the sound makes it that much more fun.
Romanian Videos 3: Camp Cheers
Cheering for our teams...it was this crazy every week. This is from week one, when I was team SUA.
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Romania Videos
Just had a friend send some videos from Romania. This one is from camp worship time, one of my fav videos because it shows the personality of girl I sponsor, Maria.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
A MacBook Odyssey...a story of epic mishaps
It has been one month and twelve days since I have been able to access my own computer. Now it is time to blog again, but first let me explain. See if you can solve the mystery...
Years ago, about two years ago to be exact, there was a teacher who was so excited that she was no longer a poor seminary student. She decided to celebrate by ordering a MacBook which even came with a free i-Pod. She was so excited. When her MacBook arrived in the mail, she turned it on ready for excitement. But shortly after turning on, the MacBook shut off. She turned it on again. It shut off again. And again, And again. She new something must be wrong. Luckily, Apple has excellent service so they decided she should send it back and they would fix it. So she did. It was a motherboard problem, about $1000 paid for by AppleCare.
A week later, her MacBook came back. It was just as she imagined...all the fun of a Mac but portable. A few months later though problems started again. This time the young teacher did not want to wait for the mail, so she took her MacBook to the Apple store, an hours drive. After $1000 of repairs again paid for by AppleCare, she had her MacBook a few weeks later. Six months later this happened again. And again. $5000 worth in repairs later, this teacher was done. She was headed out of the country and took it in for one last repair at the beginning of the summer. After that, she would DEMAND a new one. After another costly repair, always free to her, she left for two months. The poor MacBook made it through life in Romania with minimal problems, but the teacher annoyed everyone with her dominance of electrical outlets. The MacBook only worked when plugged in. It died at random if it was ever unplugged, but at least it worked. The two months in Romania required much emailing and online chatting during breaks. She might not have survived without it.
Upon returning to the US, this teacher slept for two days, then finally when she woke up she turned on her MacBook. She was so excited to see her Romanian friends online, but in the middle of a chat, her laptop shut down never to turn on again. So she took it to a local shop and called Apple asking for a replacement. Apple said they only give replacement if a computer has had at least three major repairs, so it was unlikely. But after careful review of the sage of her MacBook repairs, they appologized for the many problems and gave her exciting news. Stuart from Apple would send her a new one as soon as possible! All she needed to do was print off the labels online and mail it. As soon as FedEx scanned the labels, a new laptop would be overnighted.
Well this teacher was really excited, but with the school year beginning it was hard to find time to mail the old laptop in. The computer store offered to store her hard drive for free for a few days. Everything was perfect. She was bragging about the new laptop already. She printed the labels and taped up the package. She was a little worried that she had not used enough tape - what if the paper she wrapped the box in came loose? Surely it wouldn't, but all they needed to do was scan the label anyhow. She looked online for drop of places that had a pick up time the same day, Pack N Mail was the winner. As soon as work was over, she sped over to the store. The young twenty-something behind the counter said FedEx already picked up that day. She said that was odd the internet said otherwise. He said oh well. He said to leave the package on one of the side counters where customers packed their boxes while waiting for their turn. It seemed like a weird place to put her package. He did not bring it to the back with all the other packages. The teacher thought that was fishy, but said nothing. Then the young worker printed a small receipt off his computer. He said FedEx would not scan the package until tomorrow. She was annoyed, but what could she do?
The next few days, she kept checking for the scan online. Stuart emailed that he had noticed she printed the labels but no package was sent. She was very confused. She called PackNMail. They said not to worry, they found the package in their system but FedEx must have had trouble scanning it. It was ground shipping and would arrive in a week. All she had to do was wait. So she waited, two weeks. No package. She called FedEx and PackNMail. Now PackNMail had NO record of the package in their system, even though they had before. This was suspicious. FedEx agreed and said to file a claim. The teacher was very glad she saved her receipt. Unfortunately, FedEx said since Apple paid for the labels only they could file a claim. A small little company like Apple computers was not about to file a claim against FedEx for a package they had never seen shipped. So began the battle. One tiny sheet of paper was the only evidence that the computer was ever sent. Apple was not sure what they wanted to do. Stuart updated the distraught teacher almost every week. They were on a first name basis and he even recognized her voice when she called. The teacher was growing worried because the receipt was a month old and starting to fade to nothing. That slip of paper was the only thing she had, worth $1000 to her. She sent it to Stuart one last time. Finally, Stuart emailed saying good news, updates will ensue. The teacher was excited, but puzzled with what kind of person would use the word 'ensue' . Though Stuart no longer updated her, later that same day a FedEx tracking number was e-mailed to her. The next day, she had a brand new MacBook. The computer store put her old hard drive info onto the new MacBook. Now the new teacher has a new laptop that looks the same only runs a million times faster. No one will every know what happened to the cursed original MacBook, but now no one seems to care.
Years ago, about two years ago to be exact, there was a teacher who was so excited that she was no longer a poor seminary student. She decided to celebrate by ordering a MacBook which even came with a free i-Pod. She was so excited. When her MacBook arrived in the mail, she turned it on ready for excitement. But shortly after turning on, the MacBook shut off. She turned it on again. It shut off again. And again, And again. She new something must be wrong. Luckily, Apple has excellent service so they decided she should send it back and they would fix it. So she did. It was a motherboard problem, about $1000 paid for by AppleCare.
A week later, her MacBook came back. It was just as she imagined...all the fun of a Mac but portable. A few months later though problems started again. This time the young teacher did not want to wait for the mail, so she took her MacBook to the Apple store, an hours drive. After $1000 of repairs again paid for by AppleCare, she had her MacBook a few weeks later. Six months later this happened again. And again. $5000 worth in repairs later, this teacher was done. She was headed out of the country and took it in for one last repair at the beginning of the summer. After that, she would DEMAND a new one. After another costly repair, always free to her, she left for two months. The poor MacBook made it through life in Romania with minimal problems, but the teacher annoyed everyone with her dominance of electrical outlets. The MacBook only worked when plugged in. It died at random if it was ever unplugged, but at least it worked. The two months in Romania required much emailing and online chatting during breaks. She might not have survived without it.
Upon returning to the US, this teacher slept for two days, then finally when she woke up she turned on her MacBook. She was so excited to see her Romanian friends online, but in the middle of a chat, her laptop shut down never to turn on again. So she took it to a local shop and called Apple asking for a replacement. Apple said they only give replacement if a computer has had at least three major repairs, so it was unlikely. But after careful review of the sage of her MacBook repairs, they appologized for the many problems and gave her exciting news. Stuart from Apple would send her a new one as soon as possible! All she needed to do was print off the labels online and mail it. As soon as FedEx scanned the labels, a new laptop would be overnighted.
Well this teacher was really excited, but with the school year beginning it was hard to find time to mail the old laptop in. The computer store offered to store her hard drive for free for a few days. Everything was perfect. She was bragging about the new laptop already. She printed the labels and taped up the package. She was a little worried that she had not used enough tape - what if the paper she wrapped the box in came loose? Surely it wouldn't, but all they needed to do was scan the label anyhow. She looked online for drop of places that had a pick up time the same day, Pack N Mail was the winner. As soon as work was over, she sped over to the store. The young twenty-something behind the counter said FedEx already picked up that day. She said that was odd the internet said otherwise. He said oh well. He said to leave the package on one of the side counters where customers packed their boxes while waiting for their turn. It seemed like a weird place to put her package. He did not bring it to the back with all the other packages. The teacher thought that was fishy, but said nothing. Then the young worker printed a small receipt off his computer. He said FedEx would not scan the package until tomorrow. She was annoyed, but what could she do?
The next few days, she kept checking for the scan online. Stuart emailed that he had noticed she printed the labels but no package was sent. She was very confused. She called PackNMail. They said not to worry, they found the package in their system but FedEx must have had trouble scanning it. It was ground shipping and would arrive in a week. All she had to do was wait. So she waited, two weeks. No package. She called FedEx and PackNMail. Now PackNMail had NO record of the package in their system, even though they had before. This was suspicious. FedEx agreed and said to file a claim. The teacher was very glad she saved her receipt. Unfortunately, FedEx said since Apple paid for the labels only they could file a claim. A small little company like Apple computers was not about to file a claim against FedEx for a package they had never seen shipped. So began the battle. One tiny sheet of paper was the only evidence that the computer was ever sent. Apple was not sure what they wanted to do. Stuart updated the distraught teacher almost every week. They were on a first name basis and he even recognized her voice when she called. The teacher was growing worried because the receipt was a month old and starting to fade to nothing. That slip of paper was the only thing she had, worth $1000 to her. She sent it to Stuart one last time. Finally, Stuart emailed saying good news, updates will ensue. The teacher was excited, but puzzled with what kind of person would use the word 'ensue' . Though Stuart no longer updated her, later that same day a FedEx tracking number was e-mailed to her. The next day, she had a brand new MacBook. The computer store put her old hard drive info onto the new MacBook. Now the new teacher has a new laptop that looks the same only runs a million times faster. No one will every know what happened to the cursed original MacBook, but now no one seems to care.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
from on RO to another
As I prepare to write this blog, part of me wishes I was still in Romania and everyone around me is aware that my heart is still there I really just did not want to be back at work in River Oaks. But God has really encouraged me this week.
Anyone who knows me well knows that I like my job MOST of the time, but my biggest discouragement is that students will drop out suddenly. It sometimes makes me feel like it is all pointless. However, today I was blessed with two wonderful students back in my life. They were on my heart and in my prayers months after they left, and now today I once again have a chance to be a part of their lives. In a previous blog back in May, I wrote about both these students. Read there backgrounds here http://elamourie.blogspot.com/2008/05/highs-and-lows.html. The first I called Manuel. He read his first book ever in my class and we talked many days as he shared his fears about being a young father. He was kicked out of school for low attendence. He had to work so he could afford to support his son. Today I saw him for the first time since April. He was so excited to see me and told me how his son had grown so much. He still feels graduation is impossible, but he is determined to finish school so he will provide a great life for his son. I am so excited that I get to be part of his life again.
The second was Amanda. One day last May she just stoppped showing up. I knew she had just ended things for good with her "baby's daddy" and was worried where she could be. Today she came back. She could not stop talking about her son and all the time she had spent with him this summer. I know she feels like she can be open and honest with me still and I look forward to continuing to build my relationship with her.
Today also deepen a relationship. A student I had last year came to me today because she is pregnant. Let's call her Maggie. She is so scared and considering her options. She and I talked a lot about adoption but she knows her parents would never let her have that option. They will want her to keep the baby , but she has goals and plans that cannot happen being a teenage mother. They would probably kick her out among other things. We talked about Gladney Adoption Center and I shared what it felt like to be adopted. I was honest with all her questions, even the hard ones. She is thinking things through and I hope and pray I can help her make the decisions she needs to make.
Now I remember why I love to teach :)
Anyone who knows me well knows that I like my job MOST of the time, but my biggest discouragement is that students will drop out suddenly. It sometimes makes me feel like it is all pointless. However, today I was blessed with two wonderful students back in my life. They were on my heart and in my prayers months after they left, and now today I once again have a chance to be a part of their lives. In a previous blog back in May, I wrote about both these students. Read there backgrounds here http://elamourie.blogspot.com/2008/05/highs-and-lows.html. The first I called Manuel. He read his first book ever in my class and we talked many days as he shared his fears about being a young father. He was kicked out of school for low attendence. He had to work so he could afford to support his son. Today I saw him for the first time since April. He was so excited to see me and told me how his son had grown so much. He still feels graduation is impossible, but he is determined to finish school so he will provide a great life for his son. I am so excited that I get to be part of his life again.
The second was Amanda. One day last May she just stoppped showing up. I knew she had just ended things for good with her "baby's daddy" and was worried where she could be. Today she came back. She could not stop talking about her son and all the time she had spent with him this summer. I know she feels like she can be open and honest with me still and I look forward to continuing to build my relationship with her.
Today also deepen a relationship. A student I had last year came to me today because she is pregnant. Let's call her Maggie. She is so scared and considering her options. She and I talked a lot about adoption but she knows her parents would never let her have that option. They will want her to keep the baby , but she has goals and plans that cannot happen being a teenage mother. They would probably kick her out among other things. We talked about Gladney Adoption Center and I shared what it felt like to be adopted. I was honest with all her questions, even the hard ones. She is thinking things through and I hope and pray I can help her make the decisions she needs to make.
Now I remember why I love to teach :)
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Back to reality...
My apologies for the delay in this blog. Its been a long journey home, which included my laptop finally meeting its end my first day back in Texas. My blog is blocked at work, so I was forced to wait until I found a working computer to write.
Being back in Texas has been very surreal. It turns out I am not a full-time camp counselor, I am an English teacher. That was a harsh realization when my alarm rang Monday morning. It was hard to know a week of camp went by in Romania while I was sleeping away the jet lag. It’s hard to live in an apartment by myself when I spent the entire summer living with many roommates - twenty at the highest point. And most of all, its hard to be away from the kids. I loved getting to know Alina and Ovi, the Livada follow up staff, while in Romania. Not only was their friendship was such a blessing, but I also now can have complete confidence that each child and teenager will have amazing people pouring into them all year long. I trust that I will be back in Romania some day, hopefully someday soon. For now, my connection lives on via e-mail, Facebook, Yahoo Messenger, and most importantly, prayers. I have no idea what God has in mind for my future, no idea what part Romania will play in His plans for my life, but I do know that my heart will forever be connected to Romania and all the staff, translators, and kids I met this summer.
Thank you so much for all of you who read along with my travels and joined me in prayer. For now, this blog will return to my thoughts and adventures in teaching. You are welcome to keep reading, and hopefully someday this will once again transform into a Romania blog.
Being back in Texas has been very surreal. It turns out I am not a full-time camp counselor, I am an English teacher. That was a harsh realization when my alarm rang Monday morning. It was hard to know a week of camp went by in Romania while I was sleeping away the jet lag. It’s hard to live in an apartment by myself when I spent the entire summer living with many roommates - twenty at the highest point. And most of all, its hard to be away from the kids. I loved getting to know Alina and Ovi, the Livada follow up staff, while in Romania. Not only was their friendship was such a blessing, but I also now can have complete confidence that each child and teenager will have amazing people pouring into them all year long. I trust that I will be back in Romania some day, hopefully someday soon. For now, my connection lives on via e-mail, Facebook, Yahoo Messenger, and most importantly, prayers. I have no idea what God has in mind for my future, no idea what part Romania will play in His plans for my life, but I do know that my heart will forever be connected to Romania and all the staff, translators, and kids I met this summer.
Thank you so much for all of you who read along with my travels and joined me in prayer. For now, this blog will return to my thoughts and adventures in teaching. You are welcome to keep reading, and hopefully someday this will once again transform into a Romania blog.
Friday, August 01, 2008
Week 6- Franta
I am not even sure how to put this week into words, but I will try. This week was by far the most emotional, partly because the kids on my team were very emotional, but also because many moments my thoughts would dwell on the fact that it would be my last week in Romania. It was an amazing week to end on and I learned so much, but it took a lot out of everyone.
Going into the week some team members prayed that I would be blessed with opportunities to minister to teenage girls (so far aside from the Casa week last week my groups are teenage boys and younger girls). The very first day I was a little worried because our group had one girl, Meli, and four leaders. But God answered my prayer with four teenage girls: Meli, 17; Ana Maria who went by Usagi, 17; and her sister Lora, 14; and Erika, 20 (but she counts as a teenager in my book). Our team also had Erika’s boyfriend who came attached to her, Tranifur, and then Jonas, 18.
The very first day our team had some issues. Meli was the only one there that day and she burst into tears when the team lists were read. One of the translators, Dora, did an amazing job calming her d
own. She was upset because she didn’t like the girls on our team and she was separated from her boyfriend. Since she was the only one on the team I was worried she would not want to do anything. Not only did she do all the cheers, she played so well in the games that after the first day our team was in 1st place. Meli’s father died a while back and Rick, on our team members, was amazing at stepping in and loving her like a father would. He of course shared that even if he could not be there, God was her father. She and I talked about the fact that I was adopted and her struggles with why things happen. I am not sure how God used any of my words, but she listened. She struggles so much with believing in a God she cannot see. One of my prayers for her was that she would be able to feel His presence and know He is real.
Usagi and Lora were sisters and both were
so quiet at first. They didn’t want to cheer or participate. The two of them and Meli spend most their time at the campfire smoking. I spent most of the first day with the smokers praying for opportunities, and God provided. I found out that both Meli and Usagi knew a little English. Usagi also listened to my story about being adopted and from that moment on, we really connected. She invited me down to the fire pit to chat with them each time they went to smoke. She understood English and I understood most Romanian, but both of us were not very good at speaking,
so I spoke English and she responded in Romanian. It actually worked really well. Usagi was really into Japanese animation, hence her name change. She and Lora both had their hearts softened and began to sing the songs, listen to the messages, and just act like kids. Lora made the same progress and connected really well with the other American team member, Rachel, who was only 12. The two of them played volleyball the entire time and she started acting 14 again. After the first day, she didn’t join her sister at the smoking pit any longer- she just wanted to play.
Jonas is hard to describe. He brought me a CD with his picture on it and started talking in Romanian. I understood something about him looking handsome, but I couldn’t get the rest. Apparently he was just telling me how good looking he was. He loved to sing Manile (Roman
ian music) but didn’t want to sing “God songs”. He did however have compassionate heart. Isaiah was on crutches all week and Jonas was literally at his side constantly during the days. After Isaiah left, he clung to me and I am pretty sure he kissed my cheek at least a total of 50 times during the course of the week. He did stay to listen to the last message, the one that talked about having a relationship with God. My prayer for him is that those words will just continue to come back to him.
The couple, Erika and Trandifur, both stayed together the entire time and didn’t really want to participate in anything. I did however get opportunities to talk to both of them each meal. Thursday morning was really difficult though. The two fought and Erika would not say a word to anyone. I just sat with her for a while and prayed for her in English, then finally took her to the doctor. The two of them and Meli’s boyfriend actually got sent home for some other issues, which I was afraid would discourage our team, but they stuck together. Even Meli, who was crushed that her boyfriend had to leave, was able to pull things together to play the games and listen to Brian’s message. When Thursday night hit, each one of them cried the as the first words of prayers came out of our mouths. I have never connected so much to the entire team. It was amazing. Overall we finished 2nd, which was a great end to such an emotional week for each of them. The goodbyes were some of the hardest I’ve had to do, but I know God will continue to work in each of their lives.
As always, below are the photos...
Going into the week some team members prayed that I would be blessed with opportunities to minister to teenage girls (so far aside from the Casa week last week my groups are teenage boys and younger girls). The very first day I was a little worried because our group had one girl, Meli, and four leaders. But God answered my prayer with four teenage girls: Meli, 17; Ana Maria who went by Usagi, 17; and her sister Lora, 14; and Erika, 20 (but she counts as a teenager in my book). Our team also had Erika’s boyfriend who came attached to her, Tranifur, and then Jonas, 18.
The very first day our team had some issues. Meli was the only one there that day and she burst into tears when the team lists were read. One of the translators, Dora, did an amazing job calming her d
own. She was upset because she didn’t like the girls on our team and she was separated from her boyfriend. Since she was the only one on the team I was worried she would not want to do anything. Not only did she do all the cheers, she played so well in the games that after the first day our team was in 1st place. Meli’s father died a while back and Rick, on our team members, was amazing at stepping in and loving her like a father would. He of course shared that even if he could not be there, God was her father. She and I talked about the fact that I was adopted and her struggles with why things happen. I am not sure how God used any of my words, but she listened. She struggles so much with believing in a God she cannot see. One of my prayers for her was that she would be able to feel His presence and know He is real.Usagi and Lora were sisters and both were
so quiet at first. They didn’t want to cheer or participate. The two of them and Meli spend most their time at the campfire smoking. I spent most of the first day with the smokers praying for opportunities, and God provided. I found out that both Meli and Usagi knew a little English. Usagi also listened to my story about being adopted and from that moment on, we really connected. She invited me down to the fire pit to chat with them each time they went to smoke. She understood English and I understood most Romanian, but both of us were not very good at speaking,
so I spoke English and she responded in Romanian. It actually worked really well. Usagi was really into Japanese animation, hence her name change. She and Lora both had their hearts softened and began to sing the songs, listen to the messages, and just act like kids. Lora made the same progress and connected really well with the other American team member, Rachel, who was only 12. The two of them played volleyball the entire time and she started acting 14 again. After the first day, she didn’t join her sister at the smoking pit any longer- she just wanted to play.Jonas is hard to describe. He brought me a CD with his picture on it and started talking in Romanian. I understood something about him looking handsome, but I couldn’t get the rest. Apparently he was just telling me how good looking he was. He loved to sing Manile (Roman
ian music) but didn’t want to sing “God songs”. He did however have compassionate heart. Isaiah was on crutches all week and Jonas was literally at his side constantly during the days. After Isaiah left, he clung to me and I am pretty sure he kissed my cheek at least a total of 50 times during the course of the week. He did stay to listen to the last message, the one that talked about having a relationship with God. My prayer for him is that those words will just continue to come back to him.The couple, Erika and Trandifur, both stayed together the entire time and didn’t really want to participate in anything. I did however get opportunities to talk to both of them each meal. Thursday morning was really difficult though. The two fought and Erika would not say a word to anyone. I just sat with her for a while and prayed for her in English, then finally took her to the doctor. The two of them and Meli’s boyfriend actually got sent home for some other issues, which I was afraid would discourage our team, but they stuck together. Even Meli, who was crushed that her boyfriend had to leave, was able to pull things together to play the games and listen to Brian’s message. When Thursday night hit, each one of them cried the as the first words of prayers came out of our mouths. I have never connected so much to the entire team. It was amazing. Overall we finished 2nd, which was a great end to such an emotional week for each of them. The goodbyes were some of the hardest I’ve had to do, but I know God will continue to work in each of their lives.
As always, below are the photos...
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| RO Week 6 Franta |
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