Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Today was a reality check for me. February is Domestic Violence Awareness month and we had a guest speaker from the police department come speak to the students. Normally when guest speakers visit, the students try to be polite, but nod off in boredom. Today was different. They listened intently. And they were vocal. They were sure of their opinions and shared willingly. Male and female both argued the same points. Overall, most the students said and agreed on the following:

1. Sometimes in a relationship, you deserve to get hit (Even girls deserve to get hit by guys sometimes).

2. Girls should know better to stay out of certain things and keep their place (one of the GIRLS said this, and many agreed)

3. It is ok to be jealous and keep tabs on someone you are in a relationship with because it shows love

4. It is ok to control things like cell phone use or who each hangs out with as long as you mutually agree to be controlling.

I don't even know what to say to this. I want to pull aside the girls who readily admitted they are in a relationship where they have been hit, about 10 girls whom I am close to and many others. They don't see any other way. No matter what was said by the speaker or us, they see abuse as a part of life. I can't imagine. It breaks my heart for them, and for many of their children that they will teach the same too. It never occurred to me that the same students who we see fighting in the school hallways as a means of problem solving take the same approach in their dating lives.

Throughout the month of "awareness" and today, it was said that if you are with an abuser you need to get out of that relationship. The cycle of abuse is hard to break and people do not change unless they want to. I realize now that for many males AND females in the room, they were actually the abusers and they did not see anything wrong. They have no desire to change.

Today was just another day when teaching grammar and literature seemed so pointless in perspective. Who cares if they can pass TAKS if this is the life the life they look forward to? So many more important lessons are needed. How does one even begin to make a lasting impact?